live, not just exist

Interesting.

From another blog found this one: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mid-life_crisis . I recognize some of this as thoughts from myself, but the symptoms are not the same. I don't think that I haven't accomplished enough, I do think that current work is not using my skills, knowledge and creativity as it is more or less implementing something according to standards created by others (with little anarchy part having to use for creativity to make things actually work regardless of standards).

Part of the problem is that it is so easy just to be there, that it partially feels comfortable to not go. As job is not really requiring much it makes things feeling so easy, and from my hobby and sidejob am getting much more as challenges, and use of creativity.

Another thing could be then to make those things my job. Maybe some day. At least would like to. That would meaning having intellectual challenges, creativity, making somethings, solving puzzles etc.

dream and paths

And the adventure continues;


Based on the behaviour of some people, it seems there's invisible path what everyone should follow during the lifetime. This path is dependant of cognitive behaviour of the surroundings you live in, the wealth of family etc. The most common might be like: be kid - go school - go high school - go uni - get degree - marry someone - fill the earth with children - raise the kids -became elder - pay finally your bills and be free to do what you want to.
Now, if someone is not following this path, there are some questions arisen; if the person is different, maybe not liking the opposite sex (although nowadays that might be different as well. just to clarify; this does not picture me. I like opposite.). Why cannot people be let to live their own path, without others wondering why the hell the person is not following the path or setting expectations what should be there. e.g am I expected to get married? or have kids? and if not what that set my status? or are the both traditional behaviour of the human being set into our genome kind of setting a "thing" behind you which is still there even though you might have already gone away from this world.
Don't get me wrong, i have already my own path, which is ok. Although i am missing some common things from it, that might or might not be expected by the "normal" people. The common expectations by the community and such - a good reading is a story about Richard Feynman and the court issue where the issue goes around "majority of the people" and determining the percentage of which constitutes a majority etc.

from the first

Continuing from the first post;

Regarding for what am wanting to actually to do with the life, I came into thought that I don't actually need skills, knowledge etc when doing work according to some standards, as I would be only implementing someone else's work (standard/guideline/etc) into the area I do stuff. The knowledge is only of those standards, but the creativity is not needed on those as much as like I would create new standards etc, and that would require more skills to determine what to do, rather than copy something else. Well, this is extreme view of the area naturally and not that black-and-white as it seems from the text, but just trying to put on what I see the greatest differences - and I would like to do stuff which gets my creativity, skills into more in depth use. Would say that could help in getting more content, and quality in the thing called Life(tm).

first post

And the first post.

As of currently, I am midst of thinking what to do with the thing sometimes called as Life(tm).

Colonel John Boyd once said: "The most important thing in life is to be free to do things. There are only two ways to insure that freedom — you can be rich or you can you reduce your needs to zero. I will never be rich, so I have chosen to crank down my desires. The bureaucracy cannot take anything from me, because there is nothing to take".

Some say that money does not bring happiness, but it brings freedom to do things within life, and in that it can bring happiness with providing content more rewarding than what normal life is, thus by having a work which brings money means possibility to have that content, in which I deduct that I actually am working due to money in order to have content on life, on earlier years I thought money is not important, but seems it actually is due to this.

For some people it is to be living inside on someones life, like in my work; one manager has had a dream on "managing" on a certain kind of unit. I am in it, thus i am living inside his life instead of mine, unless the needs what I want to qualify as my life are in line what I am doing in this unit. The downside is apparent; am I even on control on my life if working in a unit which was other person's dream?

Oh well, we'll see what happens.